HELP! I Need Somebody
(We are big Beatles Fans)
There comes a point where you realize you need support in resolving the conflict you’re experiencing in your relationship.
Most couples start by researching solutions for their specific problem. They look for answers to questions similar to the ones above. If you’ve gone down this path, you know there is an endless number of resources for any one relationship problem.
Other couples search for recommendations from friends or family. Or they join a Facebook group or forum and ask what others have used. They believe if something worked for them, it could work for us.
Common Questions
- How do we resolve relationship conflict?
- How do we restore intimacy?
- How do we improve communication?
The 2 Steps Every Couple Must Take to Improve Their Relationship
Further amplifying the problem is that each person often has a different perspective on the situation. Maybe one person doesn’t think there is a problem and, therefore, doesn’t think anything needs to get resolved. Or perhaps both feel the friction, but one person is ahead of the other in desiring a solution. This disconnect means the ready partner is doing most of the research, while the other partner avoids the process as they don’t believe change is necessary. This intensifies the friction, making it even more challenging to find the right solution.
There are plenty of resources that address the problem. You’ll find blogs, quizzes, books, workshops, and counseling. Each resource addresses a specific area of concern. Examples include increasing intimacy, improving communication, learning to parent together, or finding ways to deal successfully with joint finances.
We have discovered on our own growth and relationship journeys that addressing specific problems isn’t necessarily effective until you align as a couple. It is critical to get on the same page. Then you must commit to growing, both individually and as a couple. Finally, you can create a plan for addressing your relationship problems.
Why is the commitment to growth so important? You and your partner are the people who created your current conflict. So unless you grow as individuals and as a couple, you will continue creating the same conflicts. And, without both people aligned and committed to growth, none of the resources you choose will be effective.
Before any book, online course, or counselor can help you improve your relationship,
there are two steps every couple must take:
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The 2 Steps Every Couples Must Take to Improve Their Relationship
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The normal path couples take when things go wrong
The 2 steps you must take before anything will improve